What makes us happy?

So what does make us happy? There are many elements that together can add up to increased happiness. Family and friends are crucial, with a bigger effect on happiness than salary. Finding peace through meditation, having meaning in life, belief in anything from religion to a philosophy of life and strong values, all can make a major contribution to happiness. Having realistic goals that are enjoyable to work on can help boost happiness too.

Professor Martin Seligman researched a significant number of exercises that were said to increase happiness. 500 volunteers took a battery of tests, a simple week-long web exercise and then were tested on their well-being for the next six months. Three exercises worked exceptionally well, producing lasting reductions in depression and lasting increases in happiness:

1. "Three Blessings" – each night write down three things that went well today, for which you feel blessed and grateful and why they happened specifically to you. When run on severely depressed people 92% became happier with symptoms relieved 50% in 15 days, comparing favourably with anti-depressants and psychotherapy.
2. "The Gratitude Visit" - write a gratitude testimonial to connect with someone who has been kind to you that you have not properly thanked. Reflect on the benefits you received from them and write a letter expressing your gratitude and arrange to deliver the letter personally. Spend some time with them talking about the letter and your gratitude.
3. "Use your Signature Strength in a New Way" – the VIA Signature Strengths Questionnaire measures 24 signature strengths, which are loosely organised under six virtues: wisdom and knowledge, courage, humanity, justice, temperance, and transcendence, it is based on extensive academic groundwork. These are stregths that you use, where you are fully engaged and may not notice time passing but feel rewarded when you stop. For more on these strengths see Authentic Happiness.

The field of Positive Psychology is reapidly expanding showing fantastic results for happy and indeed depressed and sad people too. In fact some studies have shown activities such as the Three Blessings to be far more effective in relieving depression than "old-style" how not to be unhappy psychotherapy.